He will preserve me and allow me to persevere...

Sometimes I have a tough time understanding how exactly my life should be conducted as a Christian. I know that I need to be in prayer and in His Word more. I need to be asking for wisdom that only comes from our Savior. My biggest fear ever and the worst thing that I could possibly imagine happening is for me to lose focus on Christ and fall into sin and away from Him. This life is without purpose apart from living for Him. It seems that I am often percieved to just be conservative with my standing as a Christian, but in reality that conservativity sems from a fear of losing focus spiritually. God has given me the only source of true happines in both this life and the next--salvation in Him and eternity in heaven to glorify Him. This is what makes my heart glad. And I guess that maybe I'm not confused as to how I should live, but I'm confused as to the standard that others hold to. I have difficulty confronting issue in others for fear of just being condemned of being a legalist. This is not my desire at all, rather, I just want to live for Christ and I want to see his standards upheld on this earth!!! When He is taken lightly or mocked or handled in a joking matter it is like a punch to my ribs. I feel pain when He is not treated with sincerity because He is my Savior and the Savior of every believer! I want to keep my heart stayed on Him to keep from stumbling. Of course I still struggle spiritually and with sin issues as every believer does, but I don't feel that this is an excuse to say "no one is perfect". Rather, where is one's heart aimed? That is the bigger question. Are you wanting to be who Christ calls you to be seriously? Or is it just some sort of game? For me, and only by His grace, my heart wants to be like Him. Maybe this is why I get confused. It's hard for me to tell if others around me are really serious about being Christians or if it is just a game to them. Now there is no way for me to be assured completely of who is a true Christian or not, but know this, the day will come where every man will have to give an account of his life before God. This is when the truth will come out and the games are all over. And eternity in hell is the punishment for those who were just playing the game, never truly seeking Christ but always just floating around and being the "spiritual people" in the Christian realms. This really should invoke fear in us. Are you serious about Christ and, thankful all that He has done for you, seeking to be like Him? Or are you just floating? If you are just floating, you are in a frightful position and I pray that the Lord will awake you from your "fakeness" before it is too late......In summary, I know that I shouldn't worry about losing salvation in Christ. Phillipians 1:6 says,"For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus." Therefore, I know that my salvation is secure in Christ. However, this does not mean that, since my salvation in Christ is assured, I can't lose focus on Him. This is why I must be in prayer, in God's Word, and following my convictions. It is far to easy to lose sight on the goal, I am well aware of that and maybe that is why I would rather be on His side of the fence than to test the border of righteous vs. sinful conduct. I would rather be conservative than to lost sight of the goal, becoming distracted, and failing to accomplish all that He desires of me in this life. This is why it is imperative to stay in commune with Him. Otherwise we can and will forget His presence in our lives. We are sinful, depraved humans and our lives cannot meet a Christ-like standard apart from His grace. I pray that He keeps my heart stayed on Him throughout this life. This is why I live. This is why I live. This the only reason that I live. "Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." Phillipians 3:13-14