A nice, relaxing Saturday night...

Today in the life of Josh Gilbert started in the wee hours of morning (about 6:30) with me walking to the Ferrel Center during the beginnings of a sunrise. I helped out at a water station for the half-marathon, "Bearathon", that the school hosted. It was really cold but fun to get out and break the monotony of a typical school week. Then I got to Skype my best friend who's doing a Bible extension program over in Israel. It was seriously one of the best convos of my life. Helped me to get a better picture of what life as a Christian is like. It isn't a life of fluff or easy decisions but rather a life of struggles and tough decisions. Not to say that joy isn't present in a Christian's life (it should be, especially when we consider that the Lord has soverignly ordained to eternally deliver his children from sins ultimate rule), but it is definitely a battle. He also pointed out to me that maybe one of my biggest struggles is thinking that I had something to do with my salvation. I often get caught up in fearing that I will fall away from the Lord or that I need to try to do the right thing based on my own morals instead of for His glory. I also worry so much about how I'm doing and base far too much of where I'm at spiritually on how I feel instead of desiring to be who God calls me to be for His glory and His glory alone. This is something that I will be in prayer about in the days to come. It's amazing to me how quickly I forget all that the Lord has done. It hasn't just been the semi-miracle of coming to Baylor a week late just a few days after being accepted. It's been the multiple ways the Lord has shown His power and provision; from delivering me from suffocating teenage rebellion about 5 years ago to completing Summer OChem, from providing for me to attend college in CA and TX, two states which I had no familarity with and not really any relatives that I knew, from working at a summer arts camp in Northern Michigan to the wild ventures of a van trip to Tulsa, Oklahoma last fall with Master's. Life really isn't crazy. It seems disordered at times but I know that when it's all said and done, and even now, the Lord has a plan and a purpose for every single thing that has happened. He knows what we need so much better than we do. I sometimes like to think about "It's a Wonderful Life", the classic black and white Christmas movie. Though the movie didn't have a neccesarily strong Christian basis, it was still encouraging to see how the life of a single individual can affect the world. As a Christian, it's comforting to know that our Lord is continually in the process of directing things and nothing lies outside of His soverignty..... With that said, I think now is the time to start realizing that this life is about the Lord's purposes. If He desires to continue to allow educational opportunity for me (maybe this applies to you to), I must give my best and ask for His grace in pluggin away at it. Just because I can't see what good it's doing it now doesn't mean it's useless. It just means tht I need to trust the Lord, who knows exactly what He wants to do with my life and the life of every believer. It's in His hands and for His glory so I must trust Him, desire to please Him with my work and life in general, and work the hardest that I can at it, knowing that's who He wants me to be. Not perfect Josh who is impatient with school and worries about what the future holds, but Josh that loves and trusts the Lord and wants to see Him glorified on this earth more than anything else. The battle between the flesh and the spirit rages on. But He continues to deliver me and I can with sincere confidence in Him that He always will. "When we all get to heaven, what a day of rejoicing that will beee, When we all see Jesus we'll sing and shout the victoryyy". Don't lose hope. God is the same God He's been through all of history and His promises are true and right. Look to Him for guidance.

For His glory, Josh Gilbert